Guest Post: Teflon John to slide off if things get sticky?

7 September 2014 by @KaroriGreenBee

National IS Team Key. Key is on every second billboard and fronts much of their media, and the party’s main message is “3 more years of John Key-led Government!” But even if the National win, will Key really lead them through to the next election?

Screenshot 2014-09-05 15.06.09

There’s a long-held opinion amongst pundits that Key isn’t in politics for the long haul; that he’s a fair-weather PM. The pundits claim that whether he’s doing a well or not, he’s only here while the going is good. Once Teflon John’s non-stick coating starts to wear he’ll go back to being a multi-millionaire banker – this time with “ran a small country” on his CV. And who could blame him? Banking has a lot more money and a lot less drama.

Over the last couple of weeks, Key’s job has been a lot less fun. Yes, you get to slur your words over the top of David Cunliffe and claim leadership points for it, but it’s a real pain when the media aren’t asking the questions you want. And when your favourite attack dog has been neutered by a screaming conspiracy theorist, you have to get in the muck and chomp at the opposition yourself. All of a sudden the victories taste less sweet.

That’s how John’s starting to look now – hassled, irritated, tired and aging. He’s still the solid career man, still good for a laugh and a beer once in a while. But he looks like he’s spent too long away from the kids, too many late nights at the office with an asshole boss, and now, to top it all off, his job is on the rocks. How long before he cries “Screw it” and walks out to enjoy his midlife crisis in Hawai’i?

No one is safe from #TeamKey

No one is safe from #TeamKey

Don’t get me wrong, Cunliffe isn’t looking great either – hell, he started the year looking as haggard as Key. But he’s looking more self-assured lately, safe in the knowledge nobody is stupid enough to attempt a coup mid campaign, whereas Key looks increasingly fidgety. How much do preferred Prime Minister polls matter if the preferred person doesn’t want to be Prime Minister?

Sure, the Left will be ecstatic if he leaves. After all, Key and his brand have been the biggest single obstacle to the Left in the last 6 years. But National supporters ought to ask themselves -“What am I actually getting if I vote National at this election?”Are the Right really going to get TeamKey for the next three years? Or is that just a starter for a main course of TeamJoyce, with a side serve of Crusher? Just how much TeamKey will you get for your vote?

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